Breaking the Distance
by parrillapower
Summary: Oneshot collection of Benson and Voight. Will include a variety of prompts - smut, angst and fluff.
1. Skype

Hi all! I've recently started watching SVU, and so I'll be writing fic for both OUAT and SVU now. Hope your holidays were merry! (I'm a little late, I know).

* * *

It had been a long day by the time Voight finally arrived home. The court session seemed to be everlasting, and after the whole ordeal had ended Erin had insisted they go grab dinner to celebrate the verdict. It was nice that he had the opportunity to spend time with her, as she was one of the few people that knew Camille and understood the importance of her presence in both of their lives. Voight never had a knack for letting people in easily, but Erin was an exception; one he was eternally grateful for. In his darkest moments he leaned on her and she never slouched or shuddered away. After Camille's death, had he not had that type of support, who knows where he would be right now.

For all he knew, had it not been for Erin, he never would have met Olivia.

So they decided to go to dinner, a small Chinese restaurant right around the corner from where Voight lived. The endeavor didn't last too long, but Voight never stopped smiling during the whole night. Stories of Camille's, Voight's and Erin's past filled the dinner table over Sweet n' Sour Chicken and white rice. And although every so often Voight would feel nostalgic towards the life he once had, as soon as he remembered he now had Olivia, he immediately felt better.

After fighting with Erin over who would pay the check which turned out to be a rather enticing endeavor as Erin reminded him he had a "rough day," proclaiming she "would cover it, no worries!" Hank headed home. As soon as he stepped inside of the house he kicked off his shoes, walked into the kitchen and grabbed himself a beer.

"I deserve one" he thought to himself. He did, after all, have to relive hell. He then walked over to the couch and rolled on to it, grasping his head in the process.

"I can't believe that just happened," he thought to himself, "we finally got the bastard."

Although he could feel time passing as he laid on the couch, Hank didn't move for a few hours. It was only when he heard his cell phone ringing from the kitchen that he snapped out of his trance and stumbled into the kitchen.

"This is Voight," he grunted into the phone.

"Hey I'm sorry, I didn't mean to wake you" she uttered into the phone softly.

"Olivia. It's fine, you didn't wake me, I've just had a really long day - that's all."

"You wanna talk about it?" she responded, treading softly as she could tell he was an emotional wreck; a side she had never seen of him before.

"Yeah I'll skype you, just give me a few minutes, alright?"

"You got it. Take your time, I have a long night ahead of me at the office."

After 10 minutes and no call from Hank, Olivia started to worry. She knew about the toll this whole ordeal had taken on Voight, well at least the primitive details she had managed to scrounge up. She had enlisted the help of Fin and Amanda to call people at his office and figure out just what he was up to today, as he had told her nothing. Only after receiving a call from Erin earlier in the morning did she even realize that he would be testifying about his past wife in court today, and having never discussed the topic with him, she figured it wouldn't be worth pushing him. She trusted him enough to know that when he was ready to talk about it, he would do just that.

And so after waiting another 10 minutes she skyped him, despite knowing there was no way he was ready to talk. It was probably selfish of her, but she missed him, and though he was in a disheveled state she wanted to hear his voice. It was her touchstone, and she had missed the sweet, grumbly sound of it all day.

It was only when he picked up that she realized just how torn he was over what had happened.

What exactly had happened in that courtroom?

"Hank – how are you?" she whispered, reaching for her screen. She wished that there wasn't distance between them and that she could hold him, that she could reach for his face and softly cup that scruffy beard that was growing.

"I'm fine" he grumbled, never making eye contact with her. They both knew that upon eye contact he would completely break, and neither knew how to deal with such raw feelings at this point in their relationship.

She was hesitant to keep talking to him, but nonetheless she continued on.

"You know Erin called my office earlier today - she said that you had to testify in court today," she spoke softly.

"Yeah, yeah I did have to" he responded, staring off into the distance.

She hated how distant he was and how she could physically do nothing about it. It killed her that she couldn't be there for him when he needed it most, nor did she know how to snap him out of it.

"She said that it was a pretty rough trial and that it was a hard day for everyone….." she continued.

"That's a bit of an understatement" he chuckled softly, finally turning to face her.

She wasn't sure what she noticed first; maybe it was the redness under his eyes, the dried tears on his cheeks or his overall tired façade. It was a side of him that she never thought she would see, he was Hank Voight for crying out loud. The macho man she had fallen in love with was showing more colors than a rainbow after the darkest storm.

They both sat there for a few minutes in silence, taking each other in. There was no need for any words to be conversed; each knew what the other was thinking.

This was certainly not how Olivia had imagined this conversation going.

It was Hank who finally spoke first, first reaching for a tissue before explaining just what had happened that day.

"Before I met you I was married to someone named Camille, and I thought she was the love of my life. I thought we would grow old together, and when she was taken from me I never thought I would love again. There are those people you meet in life that you know you're destined to spend eternity with, and I was convinced she was the one for me."

He paused for a minute, glancing up to look at Olivia. Sheer love swept over him, as she was looking at him with the most devout look he had ever seen from her. He continued on, staring back off into the distance.

"She was proclaimed to have cancer, and I took her to see a doctor who swore he could help. I really don't want to get into the details now, but long story short he promised he could help her, and so we began treatment. And it's clear what happened, but my God she sure fought like hell Olivia. She had cancer and she was the bravest, most determined soul I had ever seen. But time ran it's course, as it seems to always do, and she passed away."

"I'm so sorry Hank," Olivia whispered, a bit teary eyed herself. "She sounds like she was a wonderful woman."

"She truly was something else," he responded. "But nonetheless it later came to my knowledge that this doctor had a record of giving treatment to patients who falsely were accused of having cancer. That doctor, that son of a bitch, he gave chemo treatment to over 40 patients who didn't even have cancer. He killed that many people, just for a simple pay out. Can you believe that?" he grunted.

"That's terrible, I'm so sorry Hank" she responded.

"The only good thing that came out of it is now that bastard's behind bars for good. Ya know, he had the nerve to tell me that Camille wasn't like the others. Who does that? What kind of sick mind?"

"Well working in the divisions we do, and after what we've seen, I'm surprised you're asking that question," Olivia responded, giving him a small smile.

"I'm glad you put him away Hank, and I'm sorry you had to go through that."

"It's okay Liv. I'm a better man because of all that happened, but I appreciate you for listening to all of this."

"Of course Hank, you know I'm here for you" she responded.

A few moments of silence passed between them before any more words were spoken.

"I miss you Hank" Olivia whispered, barely audible. "I miss you a lot."

"I miss you too Liv," he responded, "but I'll see you next weekend, alright?"

"I look forward to it" she responded, feeling happy at the though of being in his arms again. She felt safe when she was with him, she felt like she was at home.

"Well tell little Noah there Daddy says hello alright," he grinned.

"Oh and Liv, before you go, there's one other thing."

"Yeah?" she asked, already knowing what was coming next.

"I love you Olivia Benson" he whispered.

"I love you too Hank."

* * *

I don't own any of the characters; all mistakes are mine!


	2. Christmas

Better late than never, right?

* * *

Olivia had just finished putting Noah down for the evening. It had been a long day full of last minute Christmas shopping, movie marathons and a fabulous home cooked meal. Olivia had wanted to go out, but since Hank was visiting for a few days, he had insisted they spend as much time together as a family as possible. "Olivia don't be silly," he grunted, "I can cook okay. You just relax." And so Olivia had done just that; she poured herself a glass of wine while she indulged in ABC's 12 days of Christmas.

When Hank had finished putting the final touches on the chicken, he called Olivia and Noah to the table. Olivia walked into the dining room and couldn't help herself from smiling. Not only had Hank made dinner, but he had also set the table and had decorated beautifully. A wreath hung on the back wall with pictures of the three of them woven into the thick greenery. Surrounding the wreath were white Christmas lights, illuminating the room to make it seem like it was glowing. Never in a million years did Olivia imagine she would ever be this lucky. She didn't just have a beautiful baby boy, she also had a loving, handsome man who loved her just as dearly as she loved him. She walked over to Hank and pulled him in for a soft hug.

"Thank you" she whispered into his ear.

"You're welcome" he whispered back, breaking the hug as he reached for her hand. They stood there for a moment – hand in hand as they watched Noah try to climb into his highchair. It was quite a sight to see; a battle between the will of a little man and the opposing force of gravity. "I better go help him" Olivia muttered over a laugh.

Once they were all settled in their chairs, Hank raised his glass. "I'm calling a toast, a toast to this wonderful year and for this wonderful family that I'm proud to call myself a part of. A year ago I never would have imagined that I'd be sitting here across from a beautiful lady and a little pain in the as- I mean cute kid. Here's to a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year." Olivia couldn't help but grin as he made his speech. No one had ever captivated her as much as this man did. "Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year" she proclaimed back. They both took a sip from their wine glasses, and dug into the meal that was in front of them.

Following dinner and the massive clean up, as Noah could never simply keep his food on the table, Hank, Olivia and Noah settled in on the couch in the living room. With Noah nestled in-between them, they watched Home Alone while munching on Christmas cookies. After an hour Noah was fast asleep, and so Olivia decided to take him to bed. "Goodnight my sweet boy" she whispered, placing a kiss on his soft head and laying him down into his crib. She then creeped out of his room, closing the door ever so quietly as he was a light sleeper.

When Olivia made her way back to the living room, she found Hank overly engrossed in the scene playing before him. Never had she seen someone so enthralled by Home Alone as Hank was. "Enjoying the movie?" she giggled.

"This is a class A movie," he responded, "I gotta tell you usually I'm not a fan of Christmas movies but this, this is some good shit Liv." She couldn't help but laugh as she trudged over to the couch.

"This is a classic Hank, haven't you seen it before?" she asked, playfully swatting at his arm. "Well of course I have, I've seen all of the classics" he mustered, giving her a slight wink. She found herself grinning again, something she always seemed to be doing when she was around him. She leaned into him, resting her head on his shoulder as they enjoyed the rest of the movie. By the end of the movie, both of them were nearing sleep. "Let's go to bed, yeah?" Hank grumbled, reaching for Olivia's hand.

"Yeah, we do have an early call," Olivia smiled.

Together they made their way to the bedroom. Olivia walked into the bathroom and quickly changed and brushed her teeth. Upon coming back to the bedroom she saw that Hank was already in bed. She drew back the covers and nestled up against him.

"Goodnight Hank" she whispered, resting her hand on his chest.

"Goodnight Liv" he whispered back.

"I love you" he spoke softly into her hair.

"I know" she uttered back, as sleep took her away.

 _"_ _And just what the fuck do you think you're doing?" Olivia screamed, following Hank as he stormed out of the apartment. "Just where do you think you're going?" she yelled._

 _"_ _I have to go back to Chicago, Olivia, you knew this would sometimes happen when you agreed to the terms of this relationship" he responded, continuing towards the elevator._

 _"_ _Understanding it and seeing it are different" she responded, running to catch up to him. "Me and Noah need you Hank, just for a few more hours. Please," she urged, taking his hands into hers._

 _"_ _You and I both know that you really don't need to leave for a few more hours, so why are you running? Did you finally realize that you don't want this; that you don't want me?" she whispered, her eyes struggling to hold back tears._

 _"_ _Olivia I can't do this right now, I'm sorry," he muttered, forcing his hand out from hers and striding towards the elevator. Grasping at straws, Olivia reached for his hand yet again and spun him around._

 _"_ _You promised me that you'd be different than the rest of them; that you were my true love, my soul mate, my lover and my best friend when all else would fail. I've shared my darkest secrets with you, my biggest regrets and my worst nightmares. But this, what you're about to do, this is my biggest nightmare of all. When I started this relationship with you I felt something that I hadn't felt since Cassidy – hope. I saw a future for us, a happy, bright future but here you are crushing everything I imagined for us. I guess you lied when you said you were different than Elliot and Nick, because right now you're walking out for solely you, just like they did to me. I deserve better than this, for fucks sake, I deserve better than all of you. If you can look at me, if you can look at my eyes and tell me that you don't want this, I'll let you go without question. I deserve better than this, I deserve better than someone who would leave me alone after all that we've built together" she cried, letting go of his hand._

 _"_ _Tell me you don't love me Hank, tell me" she uttered, never breaking eye contact with him._

 _"_ _Olivia I…"_

 _"_ _You what Hank, you what?"_

 _"_ _Olivia I-"_

"Olivia wake up, Olivia!" Hank spoke, shaking her gently. "Olivia are you okay?"

She sat up slowly in bed, confused as to where she was or what was happening. She slowly turned her head and reached for his face. Her hand cupped his cheek softly and she pulled him in for a soft kiss.

"Olivia I'm so confused" Hank whispered, pulling her in for a hug. "What happened?"

"I had a bad dream," she whispered, "but I know that it was just a dream. We're here now, and this, what we have, this is true" she replied, a single tear dripping down her face.

She caught a lucky break when she heard Noah crying in the distance. She drew back from the hug, wiping the tear off her face quickly. She smiled, as she took a moment to appreciate what she had in her life. In the past, her partners had left her to fall in her own despair, but she knew Hank would never leave her. She was his unconditionally, until they met their bitter end.

"Let's go get the kid and open presents, okay Liv?" he said, pulling her off the beds and towards the door."

"Yeah let's do that," she responded, excited for her first Christmas with Hank and Noah. This was her future, and she couldn't wait to continue living it.

* * *

All mistakes are mine; I don't own the characters!


	3. Hank meets Brian

So I finally got around to finishing this...it only took a few months, but here you go!

* * *

They weren't supposed to even go out for dinner tonight, but Hank had insisted that they did because they "never had time to go out" and he "wanted to treat her right" - as if he didn't already do that everyday. Although he never was good with words, he never failed at showing her just how important she was to him. After Brian she never thought she would find someone as caring and compassionate as he was, but she stood corrected. So after much persuading, and some bribery upon which Olivia would cash in on when they got home, they decided to go out to eat.

"Where to Olivia?" Hank asked, "pick anywhere in the city and I'll take you there."

"I'm feeling Italian, maybe can we just go to the little Italian place down the street?"

"Of course, let me just grab my jacket, you wait outside ok?"

And so they hailed a cab and arrived at the restaurant quickly. Olivia was happy about this, as she had watched Noah all day and had only managed to grab a banana and a few crackers to eat. She was desperately craving wine and the restaurant's famous fettuccini alfredo. They quickly were seated at a table, and were greeted promptly by their waiter.

"And just what can I get for you both to start off with?"

"I would love a glass of red wine, and a plate of fettuccini alfredo" Olivia responded, "and bring the wine right away!"

"And I would love a beer and the same dish, thanks!" responded Hank.

They handed the waiter their drink menus, and he left to go inform the bar of their requests.

"So how was Noah today," Hank pondered, despite knowing that the day had gone lovely. Olivia was dedicated to her work, and therefore didn't have much leisure to take days off, as she did today. Everyone at work, especially Fin, had nudged her to take a day off to spend with her son.

"It was actually really nice," Olivia smiled softly. "He's growing up too fast!"

"That he is," smiled Hank. "I wish I could be around to see the kid more, but with working long distance and having to travel so much-"

"Hank, we've been through this" Olivia responded gently. "We both knew when we got into this relationship it was going to be difficult for us to be a family, but I know you try your hardest and all that matters to me."

"I really do Liv," he grinned back at her. "I don't know where I would be without the two of you."

"Hank, you're getting all sappy and we haven't even been served dinner yet!" Olivia teased, batting his shoulder lightly. "Keep it up and you'll be crying before we get served dessert!"

"Funny Benson, real funny," Hank chuckled back at her. "You'd hate to see a grown man cry, now wouldn't you?"

"Can't say I haven't before!" Olivia sneered, thinking of all the times she had intimidated someone in the questioning room to the point of tears. "I guess it's just how people react when they're around me!"

It was then she heard her phone ringing in her purse, and she reached down to grab it.

Her mouth dropped in shock upon reading the caller's name.

She couldn't believe that he would be calling her, she hadn't heard from him in years.

"Well I'll be damned," she muttered to herself. "Hello?" she answered questioningly, as if she was unsure about who was calling her. "Yes this is still my number, obviously." "And just why should I turn around right now?"

"You son of a bitch."

Hank was confused as to what exactly happening, as a man emerged from the front of the restaurant. Olivia stood up out of her chair, smiling as she saw him walk towards her. They embraced in a hug, one Hank found too long for comfort.

"Brian, I can't believe it's you!" Olivia exclaimed. "How long has it been?"

"Too long Liv, too long," he responded.

"Too long my ass," Hank muttered under his breath. He knew he had no reason to be jealous of this guy, but jeez could he put his hand any lower on her back?

"How have you been?" she asked with sincerity. Hank could tell at one point he had meant a lot to her, and wondered when exactly that was.

"I've been good, you know just jumping around from job to job. I just follow wherever the work takes me!"

"That's really good to hear Brian, I'm really, really happy for you!" proclaimed Olivia.

"Really, really, really," Hank sneered under his breath.

"Well Brian I have someone who I'd like you to meet" Olivia grinned. She led him back to the table, and Hank stood to meet them.

"Brian, this is my boyfriend Hank Voight – and Hank, this is my old friend Brian."

"It's nice to meet you Hank," Brian stated as he reached out his hand.

"Pleasure is mine" Hank grunted, shaking Brian's outstretched hand. "And old friend – just how far back do you and Benson go?" he asked, as the three of them sat back down at their table.

"She's never mentioned me? Nice one Benson," Brian smirked, glancing over at Olivia. Olivia met him with a quick smile and a prolonged eye roll.

"Olivia and I do actually go pretty far back, I've known her since her first days at SVU."

 _Damn, that's a long time_ , Hank thought to himself. _He probably knows things about her I never will._

"Hey now, you're making me seem really old here! Knock that off," she laughed, nudging at Brian gently. "We should really change the topic before Hank puts two and two together."

"Actually Liv I would love to stay but I have a friend waiting for me up front," Brian responded. "It was really nice to see you though, we should get together and have lunch sometime."

"Yeah we really should. I've missed you a lot," she said, standing up out of her chair. He followed her motion, and brought her in for another quick hug.

"I'll see you around Benson," Brian whispered before letting her go.

"See you around," she smiled genuinely back at him.

"Oh and Hank, you take good care of this one! She's worth it" Brian asserted, staring Hank squarely in the eyes.

"Oh I know she is" Hank responded. "You take care, _buddy_."

"I will, _buddy_. See you guys around" Brian responded as he walked back towards the restaurant.

"You wanna explain who that was, Olivia?" Hank asked, unamused at the whole situation. He understood that he didn't know everything about Olivia, but he had expected "Brian" to come up in conversation at least once if he was important to Olivia.

"Just an old friend Hank, nothing more – you already know this. Brian is just special to me; he was there during times when I had no one else there for me. I really don't know where I would be without him."

"I see that Liv, I'm glad he was a shoulder you could lean on. But don't forget, you have me here now."

"I know that Hank," she smiled back softly. "And believe me I'm grateful for that everyday. I can't imagine my life without you and Noah."

"I can't either," he responded. It was then that their food finally arrived, and they dug in.

"Oh, Hank," Olivia lead before biting into her pasta, "you should really work on trying to not act jealous when you meet people from my past; you were rather obvious."

"Liv, I was not jealous, he just had his hand too low for comfort on your back!"

"And why don't I believe you?" she grinned, taking a bite of her pasta. "You know if it's any consolation, you're _much_ better in bed than he ever was."

"Well thanks Liv, that does make me feel that much better," he sarcastically replied.

"Hey don't be like that! Besides, you get to prove it to me once we get home."

"Olivia don't do this now, I'm trying to eat in public!"

"Hank, when have I every played fair?" she laughed. "You know I don't!"

"That I know all too well," he responded.

It amazed him how she managed to turn this situation around. But hey, at the end of the day, he knew that he was the one who was winning; just like he intended on winning tonight.

* * *

Per usual all mistakes are mine and I unfortunately don't own any of these lovely characters.


	4. La Douleur Exquise

La Douleur Exquise: - **_the exquisite pain and agony of wanting someone who doesn't want you_**

* * *

She hadn't meant for him to find out like this.

She had wanted to tell him the last time she saw him, had wanted to relieve her conscience from the lie she made herself believe every time she looked into his elusive eyes; that she had no feelings for him. And although she knew it was a weak and ridiculous lie, she thought at least trying to act by it would allow for her to get through the weekend without feeling anything. Feeling nothing, in her mind, was better than feeling the immense heartbreak and sadness that consumed her every waking and breathing moment.

She was unfortunately, incorrect.

Sure, it easier at the beginning of the weekend to keep her emotions masked - she kept Noah and _him_ on her mind to help relieve the obvious tension between them. Her mind even drifted to the dinner party she and Barba had attended the previous Friday. Never before had she seen him so loose and rambunctious – she was convinced she'd seen him eyeing a blonde, dashing fellow in the corner of the ballroom. The thought made her happy, but then her mind snapped back into the harsh reality she was emerged in.

She had continued to be strong all up until that last night. Within a few moments of just being near him she'd lost all previous strength she had fought so hard to keep. She knew she was in deep because of his presence, but she was Olivia Benson for Christ's sake - she knew how to deal with shoving aside her emotions. She had done it countless times before. But when he gave her that class smirk, when his arm not so subtly brushed up against hers, she lost all control over her body, over her thoughts.

It especially hit her when he gave her _that_ look. Never before had she seen someone look at her with such compassion and density – the ability to read her mind before even she knew what she wanted to say.

No previous man, not even Brian, had the ability to sift through the inner workings of her mind like Hank did. She was unsure how she felt about this, however felt comfort in knowing someone understood the real Olivia Benson on levels no one else had the capacity to.

"You know what Erin went through, that can, uh, that can screw a person up for a while," she said softly.

 _I know who you're really talking about Olivia._

"Well for what it's worth, she's got me to walk her through," he smiled back.

 _I wish I could walk you through too, Olivia._

"That's not such a bad thing," she responded, slowly glancing upwards to look into his eyes.

 _You should be here, with me, Olivia. Don't fight this._

"I wish you were here more often," he responded, not daring to break the intense eye contact they were holding.

 _I love you Olivia._

Without him saying what he was truly thinking she knew exactly what he had meant, what he had felt, but she couldn't do anything but smile softly. _He_ was waiting back for her at home; she couldn't act with her heart as she wished she was able to. Her true love was not a strength, but rather a weakness that would only devour her if she let it consume her.

And as if standing through that conversation wasn't hard enough, turning her back and walking away from him proved even more difficult. It took every ounce of power she drew from the pits of her stomach to not look back and sprint straight into his strong arms. She knew he would pull her in for a tight hug and never let go; the kind of unconditional love one expresses without the exchange of sheer palaver, but rather through the simple moments and small actions no one takes actual mind to.

When had her life become so complicated – and why above all did her heart beat for one when she was with another?

* * *

That's what had made the whole event even more shattering than she'd ever imagined it.

She hadn't even been expecting him, therefore hadn't thought twice about opening the door when she heard the doorbell ring. Tucker had insisted they spend a quiet night at home, as he never found much time to take a night off and enjoy the simplicities of life. However, according to Tucker, such simplicities included the hit show House Hunters while consuming rather large amounts of ice cream by the means of a spoon.

His job unfortunately kept him busy all of the time, which Olivia hated, but never spoke out on that notion. She understood work was one of his top priorities, but she wished he thought about her and Noah more. It sometimes felt as if he didn't even acknowledge them. At least tonight he was making an effort.

So, Olivia had actually been excited to have a quiet night with him - a quiet night with _her_ man. She had even asked Barba to babysit Noah at his place so the apartment would be open for whatever they had wanted to do.

She truly hadn't expected Tucker to be so consumed in the choices one may face when trying to select the "perfect" home.

But perhaps it was better that Tucker was occupied, she didn't want a rehash of what happened last time – their first time. Thinking about it to this day made her shudder, for all of the wrong reasons. When consummating your love for someone else, you should be thinking about that specific person while engaging in such activities, right?

And so when she opened the door she was certain that her draw dropped all the way to the floor when she saw who was waiting on the other side. What was he doing here, why was he standing not even a foot away from her when he was supposed to be in Chicago?

"Hank, I," she stuttered, unable to form any type of real sentence.

"Olivia, hi," he responded, a small smile forming on his face. She loved when he smiled; she knew it was the softer side that only she had the previous privilege of seeing shining through his rough, outer edges.

"Hank, not to be curt or anything, but why are you here?" she responded, slowly shutting the door behind her. She didn't want Tucker to hear any of this. This was her time with Hank, and her time only. She wanted to cherish her last seconds with him.

"To be honest, I don't really know. I had a weekend off, and I just wanted to see that smiling face of yours," he replied, looking down at the ground. His head quickly popped back up, his eyes looking squarely into hers. "My mind led me to the streets of Chicago, but my damn heart led me here."

She didn't know what to say. What could she say, after all, when her "boyfriend" was maybe 10 feet away in the room right behind her?

"Hank, I really don't know what to say," she whispered, barely audible. She knew it was wrong to want this, hell she knew it was illogical and absurd to want this. Her mind immediately began to list all of the reasons why this would never work: he would live thousands of miles away from her, she would only see him a few times, maybe, and above all she was in a relationship with another man.

"It's okay Olivia, I get that you can't really say anything, even if you wanted to, with _him_ here." It pained him knowing that as she thought of him, if she did, she still didn't have the bravery to confess her true feelings.

"Hank, listen it's not like-" she tried, before he abruptly cut her off.

"Now Olivia, I deserve better than that and you know that," he replied testily. "I came here knowing that your heart will never be in this but hell I won't accept you lying to my face."

There was a pause in the conversation; neither had the strength to continue. It was only when Voight's cell phone went off that they both were brought back into reality.

"Yes, this is Voight," he muttered, sliding the answer button across the screen of his phone. "Yeah I'll be back soon, I'm just tying up some loose ends. Yeah yeah, I'll talk to you later."

He hung up the phone and quickly shoved into his pocket.

She knew what was coming next, they both did but it was he who initiated it. Before she had a chance to refuse, he pulled her in for a hug. It had been everything she'd imagined. She felt safer in that moment than she ever thought was possible, and dreaded knowing that such comfort would end soon.

"I love you Olivia," he whispered into her ear as he continued to hold her. "La Douleur Exquise," he added, before slowing pulling back. He smiled softly at her, reaching down to grab her hand.

She wasn't sure when she had begun crying, but as Hank's fingers intertwined with hers, tears were streaming down her face. She knew what he had meant in saying that – she just wished she had the will to prove him wrong. She knew Hank was the love of her life, her world, but she didn't want a chance at true happiness. With true happiness comes the insecurity of maintaining such, and she didn't want to live in a world in which one second he was hers and in another he was gone.

When she managed to stop crying, Hank was no where to be seen. He had left her, alone.

She only wished that he knew how she truly felt.

But, maybe he did, seeing as he was the only soul walking the Earth who knew _her_.

* * *

I am still trying to accept the fact that Tuckson is canon, so this is a quick attempt to subdue my anger. All mistakes are mine (excuse the errors as this was rather rushed but I needed to do this).


End file.
